How to find the love of your life

It's important to remember: you cannot numb pain without numbing joy.

Stop looking for your soul mate and find the missing parts of you. It starts with you. Live your life as you want to live it.

12 basic rules to find love

So they try to present themselves in the best possible light for their imagined future partner—either youf one perfect half of a whole or as an ideal version of what they believe their future partner will want. That adds to the cycle of self-love. Wherever you are, be present and look around the room to see who is looking at you. When you become aware that you are attracted to other people because of what you have disowned in yourself, and then work on owning those qualities in yourself, your relationships transform.

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Even if opening yourself up means letting a few of the wrong people in too close, you have to know it'll be fully worth it to have your arms wide open to receive the one who will truly accept and love you completely for who you are—and who you're fjnd. Read interesting books that will help you explore and better understand human behavior and emotion.

Being in a relationship takes time, commitment, and vulnerability. Be patient and gentle with yourself as you grow.

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You don't have to earn love or put on a show. But then when stresses and vulnerabilities arise in the relationship, these bonding patterns turn negative, and the partners turn on each other. Spend time around them. This is an unavoidable stage in our developmental process because we have to form a self—or ego—that enables us to survive and hopefully thrive in our family and social yuor. So tap into what feels right for you, do the activities you enjoy, wear the clothes that suit you and in which you feel comfortable.

Perhaps you're projecting some jealousy because you feel invalidated by fins lack of attention you're getting. Trust your initial gut. There's no sense in lying about who you are. So, where do you start? Whatever you discover about yourself and what brings you joy, go create more of those kinds of moments.

More examples of self-love: Stop hating your body—it works so perfectly for you almost every single day. Go where people like the same things you like.

Spend time outside? Your imperfection doesn't make you broken ; it makes you human.

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Bite the bullet and try online dating for a big pool of potential candidates, Schwartz added. The people that have the capacity to love you wholeheartedly are precisely the ones who know how to love themselves wholeheartedly. It is important to understand that being ready for love isn't about being your idea of perfect—it's about being authentic. If you are conscious about who you are, and who you want to become—you will slowly but surely move in that direction.

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1. the ‘you’ll find love when you’re not looking’ approach may be wrong.

You're here to become more and more yourself. Because bonding patterns are the natural way that we give and receive love, they are unavoidable. And when I started to work on that, my life changed.

I am so grateful to have learned about bonding patterns because the awareness of them not only helps enormously in my relationship, but they also act as a guide for which parts of myself I have lost connection to. So we all have hidden dind disowned parts of ourselves that at some point we need to unearth.

Each relationship is unique, just as each person is unique, so how your relationship unfolds will be unique too. When I started to discover more about myself and to follow my own pathI started to live a life that was meaningful to me.

Engage with finv accept the gifts that are offered to you. And, the relationship you have with your Self perfectly reflects the relationships you have with others.

Make your decisions about love out of trust—not fear. Every single serious, playful, messy, neurotic, crazy, loving, heartfelt, honest part of you. You have to engage with the process of it and with each other, and then make decisions as you go. No matter who you meet and decide to commit to, they will be different in 5, 10, 15 years.

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Look for the themes. All you can do is live your life more fully, learn to accept and love yourself more fullyand you will love and be loved more fully. There is no need to play games or to try particular seduction techniques or to achieve milestones by a particular time. That's not scary, that's awesome. So just be yourselfwhether that means you dress in corporate attire or resort wear, or casual clothing or more formal, or if your preference changes at different times.

Part of the reason we're afraid to let people in close is because our human youur is to fiercely protect ourselves and avoid pain at all costs. You're here to have fun in the process of discovering yourself.